Bored Much?

The other week, I was with my husband’s family when one of my in-laws turned to me at the dinner table and said ‘so, still loving mothermood?’. Note, there was not an inch of sarcasm to her tone. She was deadly serious. She wanted an answer. My initial response was two-fold: 1) puzzlement – when had I ever given anyone the idea that I was loving motherhood? had I got drunk and said it? and 2) – holy shit, no. I do it. I do my best at it. I totally, honestly love my kids but do as to loving the actual job of being a full-time mum? Not so much. Of course, I didn’t say any of this. But neither could I lie. So instead, I did what any grown-up woman would do and faked my own death. It was easier than confessing to all of the above and I figured it would cause less of a commotion at the dinner table.

Fake death gags aside, am I the only one who doesn’t find it the best job in the world? Am I missing out on something? I mean the pay sucks. The hours are relentless. The holidays non-existent and only this morning my ’employers’ decided to grab my attention by doing a poo in the shower, before going on to crap all over the carpet while I cleared the first mess up. And just in case that lacked impact, my son then gagged so violently over the smell, he vomited over himself. I don’t remember my last boss doing that. Although of course there was that incident at the Christmas party…December 2007, what a night that was….

mummy wants a cocktail

So anyway, no, as hard as I try to run with the whole stay at home mum thing, I just can’t convince myself that it’s the career for me. I know that for some women it is and while I often struggle to click with them and the stuff they talk about, I’m not dissing the gratification they get from bringing up their kids. In fact I’m pretty freaking jealous. As someone who doesn’t deal too well with the same-old, I wish I could take more pleasure in the day to day stuff. But I can’t. The fact is, I find it boring. There, I’ve said it. I’m bored. No fake death today. I am bored. Singing The Wheels On The Bus 47 times a day? Boring. Sitting at a soft play session while another mum takes 40 minutes to tell me about the time her son trapped his finger? Boring. CBeebies? A Godsend but honestly? When I do finally have my Falling Down moment and smash the shit out of the telly, it’ll be the relentless sound of Upsy Daisy screeching down that bloody trumpet of hers that will push me over the edge. How do I feel today, how do I FEEL TODAY? Sweet Jesus Tweenies, don’t get me started.

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19 thoughts on “Bored Much?

  1. bswebb says:

    I’m with you on this one…I wouldn’t change my children for the world, but my goodness, I cannot wait to go back to work in the new year. They are wonderful little things but like you say, after 47 rounds of ‘the wheels on the bus’ I am contemplating leaving the country.

    And sitting there at a baby group last Monday I was faced with a new mother asking me what to do about her son having liquid nappies! Apparently she thought I might know as I was the only one there with two children! I spluttered about fibre and a good intake of fluids and made my way to the kitchen for another slice of cake, then proceeded to avoid all eye contact with the mother in question.

    • Ha! Do you find yourself going along with these inane conversations whilst inside you’re screaming ‘PLEASE STOP TALKING. PLEASE STOP TALKING. PLEASE STOP TALKING’?

      So nice to hear there is someone who feels the same as me – I kind of feel the need to launch a little campaign for this truth in parenting business as there must be more of us out there too but trying to hunt them down amongst an army of yummy mummies who can’t get enough of the kid stuff is tricky.

  2. Just wanted to say I love, love LOVE your blog title!

    • thanks so much! not so much a specific gina hater, more that whole pressurised perfect parenting thing I struggle with….really appreciate your comment, you’ve got a really great blog

  3. Emma says:

    Just stumbled upon your blog and love it- I love your honesty and humour. I think any mum who doesn’t identify with those feelings of frustration and boredom is lying. Ive 5 kids myself so I know allllll about it. Keep her lit lovexxx

    • thanks so much for your comments – just took a look at your blog and think it’s great – especially the Much More Than Coffee post. Love those moments when you meet a person who makes you stop and wonder if there was a reason you just came into contact with them. Thanks again xx

    • Lauren says:

      Emma… I keep coming back to your comment “Keep her lit love”….. It has really struck a chord with me and it’s going to be my daily motto!!! Now I have a bit of extra time on my hands (2 kids now at school & 1 at kinder) I am absolutely going to begin working on relighting my spark!!! This parenting thing is bloody hard work!!! 🙂

  4. Phillippa Edgar says:

    Abs your answer is straight forward yes you enjoy motherhood but it is not the correct career path for you 🙂 I dont think anyone really would want to choose full time motherhood as their only career (unless you have a qualification in childcare and that was your choosen career path) and I am not necessarily talking working outside of the home full time. I personally thought it was just me, I always said I woud not be able to be a stay at home mum and I have proved myself correct don’t get me wrong I love spending time with my babies and this time around I am off for 15mth and not just 9mth however I have a secret weapon – my final year at university (end of a long 5year slog :)) ), lectures once a week and the excuse at weekends to spend time on my dissertation and assignments means I get to break away from the noise that is cbeebies. Loving motherhood does not have to equate to being a mum 24hr a day 7 days a week 52weeks a year, loving motherhood is enjoying your children, loving them and having fun with them. Loving all your Blogs keep them coming they are my distraction x

  5. Sarah Miles says:

    We have recently moved area for my husband’s new job and I gave up work, theoretically for 2 years, until number 3 starts school. Just can’t get excited by the latest kitchen cleaner and the price of nappies. Hoovering does nothing for me and I drag myself to Monkey Music in a bid to be a better mother. I think there should be a toddler group where baby talk is banned and women can converse normally. Love your blog – I started mine to regain a little sanity and because nobody else listened to me!

    p.s. After flinging my Gina Ford book across the room I gave it to a NCT sale with a note saying ‘Good luck with this one’.

    • Monkey Music! Sing With Mummy! Jo Bloody Jingles! I know the kids love these things but sometimes don’t you catch yourself singing about sizzling sausages jumping out the pan and think ‘holy crap, I’ve actually gone insane’??! Thanks for the post – loving these comments from people because this mum stuff can be a lonely business when you feel you’re the only one that feels this way, so it’s really brilliant to know I’m not alone after all xx

  6. Matt Cox says:

    Possibly your best article yet!! x

  7. I wanted to write a serious reply but am still too busy being creased over laughing to be able to do that! Fantastic post!

  8. Mine are both at school now but I used to find myself creating ‘alternative’ versions to the songs (actually, still do) and avoiding certain playgroup mothers (especially those who told me that SPD didn’t really cause many problems, did it? and that having children under the care of GOSH was ‘good’.) I love my children to bits, but I love my days in the office too x

  9. I’m so with you. Love my girls, know I’m lucky to be able to be at home with them but give me some space please! 🙂 It’s an INSET day today, so I’m ignoring two children instead of just one

  10. HPMcQ says:

    great blog, great honesty and great humour
    i’ve told friends not to worry if they find it boring it happens they still don’t believe me, i will send them your post as back up! x

  11. MotherWifeMe says:

    Woot Woot! What a refreshing read! My darling tinkerous toddler is my world, I love and cherish the amazing moments with her, but oh my, oh my, the endless rounds of all the stuff that I really don’t need to type here as every mum knows what I mean, are just, soooo dull. My saviours in the real world are my mummy friends though, I avoided NCT like the plague (sorry NCT-ers) and instead have made my friends through going to things I am actually interested in. Result – a group of mummy friends, where the kids get to playdate, whilst we get to talk about anything other than mummy stuff (most of the time). Keep writing, because I really want to keep reading…

  12. lol! I have recently returned to work and no one has pooed on me since I started – some days the staff even bring me tea! Result!

  13. Lauren says:

    Oh god….. Love my kids to bits but I definately enjoy my kid free hours at work!!! Just read all of the replys to the blog and one comment really stood out at me “Keep her lit love”……. Love it and so so true….. Having 3 kids (one with special needs) you can definately lose a bit of yourself!!!

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